You know I believe, that we are meant to be

Saturday, May 16, 2009

To; the boy I love really much & the other Seven

What's with the love?

It's a time that passed a lil bit late. Hate and missing you for leaving me, for taking back all your words. I've got no sense of direction. I've decided to suffer alone without you soon. Really soon. What's the point moving on being used, having no trust and all. Why listen to others instead of yourself? Im facing the truth even I don't know what to do. You must be happy now that im really backing off soon. Whereas me here, trying to erase those memories. Maybe what they say was true. I've wasted half the year on you/them. I still remember when you were drunk, you said things which you really mean it. You said you were not drunk so I believed it. Then, this happened. You shouldn't have said it if you don't mean it. That was what you said. I remember almost every single thing. What will you do if you hurt. I just can't forget every thing, but im trying with the help of smoking much?, crying?, screaming and papercuttings. Let's hope everything goes well. All i could say is only I will miss you. You'll forever be in my heart, really I mean this. Im not moving on after what happened to me. Im never gonna let myself be use again. I'd be glad if you really come back to me one day, even if it take years.

Boy I miss you. The world revolves around in you. I don't know why I fall for you. You've changed my whole life. You change to my surprise. It's fast. From the day we go to the zoo, till a week before you started school. I hate you but I love and I miss you. Im confused with your love. Why? Why must I be in love with you. But it's okay, Im okay outside with all this things happening. It's never too late to tell you I still love you. Definitely your life is better without me. Forgive me for whatever shits I've caused you. With this tears rolling down my cheeks, I've decided things must change. Not a must, it has changed. I'll always be here for you and I hope what you said to me that you'll be here for me is true. Even everything have been destroyed and the love is dying and Im feeling hopeless, I still appreciate you for eveything. And I know at times I regret. But not as much as how much I enjoyed being with you having your accompany. Im trying really hard to move on after we meet maybe for the last time. Let me say what I want cause I know it will gain you much and I'll be the one at lost. Really. Lend me your shoulders for the last time for me to cry before we officially end our relationship. I just ask for your time to really sit in front of me and listen to all that I've got to say. And I'll be excluding myself from the BestFriends. Its up to you 8 to exclude me or not. Give me time and decide more things. Im really sick of everything. There's not even trust and I can't believe that you people still have the cheeks to talk bad bout each other behind each other. Being a hypocrite/backstabber. Please remember I was already bitched/fooled/cheated by some of you. And yet, you people are acting nice to me still. Even it happens more than twice to me from one person, I've let it go. But yet now, it happens again. Thanks! And I know where the rumours come from, from who and all. Thanks a lot yeah? Now, may all of you feel satisfaction doing many things for me just for the sake of to believe. May you all happy enjoying yourself without me.

Hugs&kisses; NurSalishaBteNoFather
Your worst ever friend right?

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♥ L i s h a ♥