You know I believe, that we are meant to be

Thursday, July 16, 2009

MOVED.

I've moved. No longer here, bye bye.

♥ L i s h a ♥

Saturday, May 16, 2009

To; the boy I love really much & the other Seven

What's with the love?

It's a time that passed a lil bit late. Hate and missing you for leaving me, for taking back all your words. I've got no sense of direction. I've decided to suffer alone without you soon. Really soon. What's the point moving on being used, having no trust and all. Why listen to others instead of yourself? Im facing the truth even I don't know what to do. You must be happy now that im really backing off soon. Whereas me here, trying to erase those memories. Maybe what they say was true. I've wasted half the year on you/them. I still remember when you were drunk, you said things which you really mean it. You said you were not drunk so I believed it. Then, this happened. You shouldn't have said it if you don't mean it. That was what you said. I remember almost every single thing. What will you do if you hurt. I just can't forget every thing, but im trying with the help of smoking much?, crying?, screaming and papercuttings. Let's hope everything goes well. All i could say is only I will miss you. You'll forever be in my heart, really I mean this. Im not moving on after what happened to me. Im never gonna let myself be use again. I'd be glad if you really come back to me one day, even if it take years.

Boy I miss you. The world revolves around in you. I don't know why I fall for you. You've changed my whole life. You change to my surprise. It's fast. From the day we go to the zoo, till a week before you started school. I hate you but I love and I miss you. Im confused with your love. Why? Why must I be in love with you. But it's okay, Im okay outside with all this things happening. It's never too late to tell you I still love you. Definitely your life is better without me. Forgive me for whatever shits I've caused you. With this tears rolling down my cheeks, I've decided things must change. Not a must, it has changed. I'll always be here for you and I hope what you said to me that you'll be here for me is true. Even everything have been destroyed and the love is dying and Im feeling hopeless, I still appreciate you for eveything. And I know at times I regret. But not as much as how much I enjoyed being with you having your accompany. Im trying really hard to move on after we meet maybe for the last time. Let me say what I want cause I know it will gain you much and I'll be the one at lost. Really. Lend me your shoulders for the last time for me to cry before we officially end our relationship. I just ask for your time to really sit in front of me and listen to all that I've got to say. And I'll be excluding myself from the BestFriends. Its up to you 8 to exclude me or not. Give me time and decide more things. Im really sick of everything. There's not even trust and I can't believe that you people still have the cheeks to talk bad bout each other behind each other. Being a hypocrite/backstabber. Please remember I was already bitched/fooled/cheated by some of you. And yet, you people are acting nice to me still. Even it happens more than twice to me from one person, I've let it go. But yet now, it happens again. Thanks! And I know where the rumours come from, from who and all. Thanks a lot yeah? Now, may all of you feel satisfaction doing many things for me just for the sake of to believe. May you all happy enjoying yourself without me.

Hugs&kisses; NurSalishaBteNoFather
Your worst ever friend right?

Pergilah Sayang Walaupun Ku Rasa Menyesal

♥ L i s h a ♥

Friday, May 15, 2009

What's behind those promises/sweet words?

Im feeling really sick but yet there's immatured kids out there who made rumours. Fcuk uh, grow up. I've not been to school for two days. I declare myself as really sick. Im withdrawing soon. I can't move on like this. Couldn't imagine why people choose to be this way, especially you. But still ily. Say im a Bitch, Slut or whatever you want as long it makes you happy okay B?

I've cancelled every plans that I wanted to like catching the sunset cause something just upsets me a lot. I shall not elaborate it here. Im at lost now. Though I am feeling very sad and all. Thanks to itu Kodok for cheering me up. Really, thanks. Happy Belated Seventeen.

Kay, be happy im not making this blog private since I own a private blog. If you want an access, text me up. I'll see how okay.

Love everyone except those being a slut/bitch.

♥ L i s h a ♥

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Im not uploading any pictures.

Where were you with all those words?

Alright, I really had a tough time going to school trying to walk. I was so upset over something till I don't even know how am I going to face them. I cried a few times cause I was terribly upset. I never felt this way before. Never felt so upset like this. But I know I will face them with my own will. I will go wherever I can and im not following what they want instead of mine. I'll do the right one after I get tired of being this way. Which I don't know how long more. I really give up. So don't even think of talking about me cause it doesn't matter you much. It's something that is not needed to be talked. Whatever it is, thanks friends for the stuffs that you people made. Thanks for trying to make me feel there's still light. (:

Anyway, HAPPY ADVANCED 7-TEEN BIRTHDAY TO SHAK-LOOOSE(Shakilah the Bimbo).

Seems like I can't do much since im like this and we missed the bowling party. Next time perhaps. Study hard and don't get so hyper when you think of him. Big O's first! Haha, kay love ya bestfriend/partner!

Thanks to you for promising to me to be here for me. Let's see if this promise is also another one that is meant to be broken. Love you.

I don't know how I am facing you people who care much for me. I feel so ashame. Thanks for planning for the meet ups. At the state I am, I just wish to go many places. And I am looking forward to meet you peoples. I am looking forward to catch the sunset. Definitely, looking forward to spend time with you people. You people are another clique that I really missed a lot. 9BestFriends, may we last forever&everrrrr.

♥ L i s h a ♥

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

(If you remember this)

How many times do we get hurt? How many times do we have to make tough decision? Lastly, how much time are we even left to be together like we used to. Perhaps, its not much now that things have changed. Here I am, ranting every single thoughts of mine up on this hill. I wished I died, leaving every single things that keep on leaving me one by one. Im left with nothing cause I realize i've lost much of my life.

This time, I feel half happy, half sad. Happy is, I get a feel of something which most people probably don't want to be. Being unable to stand on your own feet is something most speaks saying it's easy if you think positively. But when you're really facing it, then you'll realize the difference between speaking and facing it. It's not easy but maybe I am enjoying every single bit of it. Sad thing is, much money is wasted when I don't even want to make an effort of going therapy and think of getting well soon. I feel good this way. Let others say whatever they want about me. Cause I still feel good this way, maybe. I still thank mummy&daddy for every cents. For every thing they tried to make me change my mind. But you know I still won't. Im appreciating what God had given me to face at this point of time. Be it good, be it bad. Only God knows what I needed most now, my pillar of strength.

Even at times like this, im trying every effort not to make a fuss over anything. But you did. Don't you think of anything before starting? I feel very disappointed that every single word from you from the beginning have changed. Our love was a lie. You must be glad that you punished me and return me with something after all i've done like as if my mistakes were intolerable. You're really something. Someone whom I love really much. Hoping not to end myself in regrets. Forget it. I love you and I do miss you. I know you don't.

Nights, i'll be making this blog private really soon.

Thanks for every get well soon texts, balloons, giant cards and anything else I received including the hardships im facing.

♥ L i s h a ♥

Monday, May 11, 2009

Thanks to the lady in the centre for saving me yesterday. The environment here is so annoying. I musn't elaborate much on what happen. Im safe and even I am kind of badly injured with bloods all over, im alive. Let's hope going therapy will help.

Fcuk that cab.

Dear Baby,

It's not that I don't want to tell you. Sometimes, I realized even if I tell you, you wouldn't care much right since the big fight incident. Hoping that you won't know so it won't affect you. Now that you know, you showed your care. It wasn't even a plan to happen. It's not I asked it to happen. It happens to me without me knowing. Now that I am safe, be happy. You shouldn't have been told cause you don't deserve to know this. And moreover, I am reflecting back. You don't even tell me anything and why am I telling you this. But now since you know I need to go therapy hoping that it would make me feel better, take this time enjoying yourself while I suffer for good. Now things have change between us. You've got to show what you want. Stop acting and putting up lies if you do. Taking care. I really miss you. I love you, forever.

♥ L i s h a ♥

Saturday, May 9, 2009

I feel like coming back. So here I am once again.

Today was okay. Picked Baby with Ayul up at Kembangan and headed to Orchard Cineleisure. Meet Sheila then her boyfriend, Fiqq. Meet Baby's daddy and headed to Simei to jam together with Fiee&Fizz. I find Baby cute today. He was singing with the laptop in front of him. Tell me who would bring their own laptop just because of the lyrics? My Baby do this every jamming session. Cool sey. Kay not boasting. I just find no one doing something like this except him so far. Don't waste paper just to print kids. Okay im talking environment rubbish. Then headed off to Tamp with the rest except Ayul&Baby's daddy. Kfc since they were hungry. I wanted to eat at first but I just feel like not eating. Baby bought the idk the one with box and zinger. Omg, I think if I buy I won't even be able to finish it up. Kay understood. He was too hungry. We kinda hang out at kfc cause they were listening to their recordings. Then headed home.

Baby is recording again at home. Suspect confirm with his guitar. Soooobbbbbs. No one at home and im left here. I shall hit Mac later around four to get breakfast. Im craving for pancakes :D Currently waiting for this kid to finish recording and accompany me by sms-ing.

I miss school. I miss partner and the clans. Monday no school and Tuesday too since I have no papers. Wednesday is only 1 hour of Sciences MCQ and Thursday is 45 mins of listening compre. Pathetic week. But Thursday marks the end of MYE. & its Shaaaaaak's birthday. Omg, can't wait cause might be going bowling party and baking cookies which tastes and smell exactly like Famous Amos! Thanks to Thivya who agreed on lots of people coming her house just to bake the cookieeeeeeees. Coooool siaaaaaaaa. & when will I get to meet Baby and Bestf's again? Bestf's having MYE, so good luck and please STUDYYY. I'll be waiting for results. Hell, I hope there's improvement especially Malay-.- which I know I did better for certain subjects cause I STUDIED. Malay O's first intake is like THREE weeks time. Argh, I want A1! And i'll be screaming cause I don't have to attend the useless Malay lessons conducted(really no life cause every lesson do things irrelevant to O's). It's not only on my opinion, the rest too. Big difference from last year.

Omg, I am dead bored plus scared here. Oh yes! Happy mother's day to my dearest mummy and all mother's out there. I can't wait to surprise her with the chocolates bought and hopefully my boncit brother brings home pizza or baked rice or what. Eh wait, Im starting to crave for lasagna too since Fizah and Faa talking bout it. Grrrrrrrr. Okay Bye. I want to ring my brother up to ask him bring home lasagna!

Babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, imissyou boncit :D

♥ L i s h a ♥